I'm not allowed to complain. Even here I can't do it easily. What choices do I have? I've not cried since I was a youngster...that stuff is an outlet isn't it? I'd like to turn the shite into running or heavy exercise but energy isn't a commodity during these times. I understand so g-damn little...people alarm me more than not...I crave to be a part of the whole party but it's just too confusing. Solitary is the result. 10 years out of the loop of living. Consequences? boo-f-ing-hoo. In my soul anyway. I really need to kick a nazi.