Quote:
Originally Posted by reesecups
Interesting. When I began group last March, I had to experience having a male group leader. Made me uncomfortable at first, especially since his name is John like my father and they dressed similarly, and I DEFINITELY have daddy issues. I actually began thinking he was pretty good. I like the guy now and usually enjoy his groups. The last time I was hypo I embarrassingly divulged this stuff in group. I'm still embarrassed about it. I hope he didn't think I meant romantically I like him. I just said something along the lines of why I had first been intimidated and that he wax a pretty nice guy. And it wasn't just a statement, but I was gushing. Still kind of embarrassed about that.
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I have man issues but never had problems when i was in a group with more people. But what I noticed after this experience with a male T (it was for six weeks, i saw him individually twice a week and he also did some groups) That my fears are less then first, in situations where i am alone with a man. I noticed that recently I walked during daytime in my street and a man walked past me and he was greeting me. I said 'hello' back and looked at him. Normally I would look at the ground, because there were also no other people. And in more situations, things changed. So it was a good experience for me. Still, my preference is for a female therapist.
I know that embarresed feeling. I can be very impulsive, say what I think. One day my T looked very good. I said something like 'wow you look good, you are a beautiful woman' When I realized what I had said I felt ashamed and I was worried that she would think I meant it in a romantic way.
We talked about transference and she even asked me if I was in love with her. Because i was struggling with feelings for her. I told her then, if I was in love with her she would have noticed that, because i would have made a move! hahaha
The feelings that I found difficult were more maternal feelings, I began to see her as a mother.
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