Bloem, you are a beautiful person. You will be ok, and it is really good that you are reminding yourself.
I have recently been working with a group that focuses on how your spirit/energy of you can not be affected by what you experience, say, feel, think. It is beyond anyone else's reach in this world. This means that no matter what has happened to you, what you have done, said, or felt, your spirit is whole, perfect and untouched. I have been clinging to that belief over the last few months. It makes me feel safe, beautiful and whole. I hope that you can feel that there is still a part of you untouched by everything that has happened. I hope this doesn't sound like preaching or rude in anyway, I just wanted to try and help. xo
IJ