Sorry for another thread. I just want someone to help me figure out what is going on.

I really REALLY want to hear my T tell me that she loves me. I've been trying to get her to say it for a few days now by manipulating the conversation without directly saying it. We've already talked about my desire for her tell me she cares about me so this situation really isn't that different. It's just a different word. She won't say it and if I tell her how I am feeling, every answer she could conceivably give would make me really upset.

Why do I feel this need to hear her say she loves me? I wouldn't believe her if she did anyway. Or I would believe her, but I'd need her to reconfirm that she still loves me everyday because love was such a conditional thing for me growing up. The word means nothing to me and yet it means everything.

She has said "people here love you had you need to learn to feel that love without questioning it" but it isn't nearly the same as if she said that she loves me directly.

How do I get over this?