Thank you so much for all your wonderful replies! This is the first time I've knowingly spoken to other sufferers and I can't tell you how exhilarated I feel to read about your similar experiences and feel something closer to understood. As a result of reading your messages on the train this morning I was in a great mood when I got to work...unfortunately it was rapidly supplanted by uncontrollable vitriol towards my colleagues and later floods of tears (why is crying so shameful? I think it is the most natural thing in the world, I am just so embarrassed because other people would be embarrassed for me and I don't want that!).

beloiseau - Thanks very much for your kind words. I'd be really interested to hear about your exploration of DBT as you progress through it, if you are happy to share here or in chat or private messages or whatever exists here (I'm yet to explore the site properly!)

technigal - Definitely experienced that lightbulb moment too, it's nice to know the self-realisation is sometimes just as shocking for other people. I'm curious - in Canada does your medical system offer proper diagnosis free of charge? Everyone raves about the NHS in Britain (and rightly so...wow, I probably would not be alive without it), but unfortunately I've increasingly found it to be very deficient in terms of mental health. I've certainly no affordable option open when it comes to being diagnosed and even if I were, there would be no treatment I could get for free, or even for cheap. If Canada can offer proper healthcare following a diagnosis then that is amazing!

I'm 25 and I feel lucky to have stumbled upon this information...

So tired. I'd respond so much more extensively but today has been so crushing and I have to get up at 4am for something which requires socialising with strangers. I will scare them all away!

I hope everyone is feeling oooookay today. This is needlessly long.