I feel the exact same way about everything in my life. You're post made me smille because I realize I'm not alone in this battle. I feel silly too. Don't think to much, if you feel a urge do it right then. What keeps me from doing something is keep thinking to much about it, how the others will see me. There should be some clinics open at night because it is the moment, for me, when things seems to be the worst. Sleep make me forget how I really feel. I also feel that I'm not so ill in the morning. But for me it goes for everything, every disease. I remember when I was a little girl i run to my mothers bedroom telling her what had been bothering me, what couldn't make me sleep and the day after I feel totaly stupid, but it kept happening.