I would agree that you just need a different type of therapist (or therapy). I'm facing similar fears, but more on the end of not being able to find a program to help me. I've found I have trouble working through things on an outpatient basis...
Also, I did not read up on what your t has said earlier, but I'm glad she was able to be direct about her inability to he'll you further. She did not say you are unhelpable, but said her skill set can't help you. As painful as it is to feel abandoned by a t, is also more ethical than just dragging along and getting nowhere. I know that's something I will keep having to tell myself that as I'm at risk of losing my own t If I can't pull things together. (Hugs) hope you can work through things with your current t.