It has often been said that we only had this problem of parents needing to rely on their adult chidren so much because people live so long. When people died in their 60's they were able to take care of themselves up until they got sick and died.

I try very hard to be there for my mother. I just set clear limits regarding how often I could be with her and she knows when she can plan on me to help. She doesn't mind my concentrating on other aspects of my life because she knows she is included in my plans.