Britt,
as you have discovered, leaving it alone only makes things worse. I doubt this is something that you can do on your own. If you have a regular Dr., have him/her put you in touch with a therapist. Trauma from childhood doesn't just go away when we grow up. Its when the problems start. Regardless of whether there was sexual abuse or not, there was certainly neglect. No child should have to be the adult. It leaves scars and you can bury them for only so long.

A therapist will help you work through some of those painful memories and find a healthy way of coping with them. The forum is a good place to unload and find others who are where you are or have been there, but its not a substitute for a therapist.

If the first one you find doesn't seem to click with your personality, don't give up. Finding a therapist is a bit like finding a friend. Just as you aren't compatable with every other person, you won't be with every therapist. You need to find one that you feel comfortable. I know its scarey, but you have already taken one of the most important steps. Admitting that you have a problem that you can't deal with alone.

Sam2