This T definitely messed up. That crack about Hawaii was out of line. Either she is comfortable with it or not, and she really does not seem comfortable with it. Plus she made this totally false assumption, totally on her own, that your financial situation would change. You said you needed a long term solution, she offered a short term solution without thinking it out, then backtracked. And hurt you. I wouldn't give her the cash. I would buy pizza for my boys.