Oh, SP! I hear your feelings of being a failure and like T is tired of this i have been there and it is such a sad place for me to be in. I think going to see your T will be hard, but super important - because you ARE worth it. You made a mistake but nobody's perfect and your T will want to help you to change the things you want to change. She can help you to explore what happened and what it really means about you. I know in my heart it does NOT mean you are not worth it or a failure