yea...
im giving up on myself
i have been for awhile

i think i even announced it heere.

i just...dont care about myself so much anymore...
..im not going anywhere. no where i wanted to. all my back up plans have rotted. all my initial plans have rotted.

and apparently im still pretty sick. i can feel it anywya. the paranoia and hallucinations. and the cognitive stuff. ive been wanting to talk less to people. ive been giving up more on talking to forums. i dont feel the need to. i guess i used to think people would care more. but they do but idk. i thought some miracle would happen for me.