Hey sweetie! Ive missed you! You definitely are going thru something - sounds like an all moods at once kind of thing. . I don't know what the answer is - what's your plan to stay out of trouble when these risky behaviors come on? No judgment, I've been there :/ we just need to avoid things like jail or other things we regret when thinking clearly.

I wonder too if it's getting worse with age... Idk. I think when we're in episode it just seems like all there is & it's near impossible to remember feeling sane & that that felt good & stable. But when in an episode, it's clouded like who wants stable or pshh like that's even possible. But it is possible - I'm half faking cuz I'm in it too right now - but I want my life back harmonious & organized. If things were ever once at least ok, it's possible for them to be ok again.