Thank-you for all of the responses; I really appreciate it. I already have begun to distance myself from my friend, and she is probably more like an acquaintance now than a friend. We hang out at LGBT events, work out together, or go to social events from time to time, but she is not someone I count on for emotional support or connection, or someone that I share the intimate details of my life with. However, I feel that it is in my best interests to stay on good terms with her, because we run in the same social circle. The lesbian community here is not that big, so getting on anyone's "bad side" would probably not be a good idea.

I also do not think it would be fair for me to ask my friend (or "acquaintance") to stop seeing my T at this point, as she has already been going to my T for a year. Since I made the recommendation, I feel as though I have to stand by it and allow my friend to have her own, separate relationship with T. (I can, however, continue to enforce my boundary of not hearing about it).

I have spoken to my T about the issue, and we will discuss it in more detail during my next session. She apologized and she explained the situation. She really felt quite bad about it. To make a long story short, she had initially double-booked me with another client, asked me if I could reschedule, and gave me a new appointment time. Then, that client cancelled, and the slot opened up. Instead of offering it to me again (since she figured I already had the new time), she offered it to my friend, who had asked for an appointment. My T said she simply didn't think about the implications, but acknowledged that she made a mistake and she should have offered me my time back (as I really wanted it and would have taken it).

While I don't think I need to tell my T the bad things my friend says about her, I will talk to my T about the fact that my friend seeing her is having a negative impact on my therapy. If nothing else, it will help to get my feelings out there in the open, in a more concrete way. I have told her that it bothers me, but I don't think she knows how much. I don't expect her to "do" anything about it, but I think having it on the table will be helpful for me.