Thats exactly how I felt. I always imagined myself being much happier when I grew up, and somehow things just got worse and worse. I also am stuck in a terrible, dark place.

I was an unhappy kid, and sure enough I am a miserable, depressed, sick, adult now. I still feel like a kid tho for some reason.
And since Ive been stuck in this house for six years (going on seven), I also have forgotten what it feels to be touched, and all those nice things that we all need. So I know what youre going through right now.

All I can say is, hang in there, theres always a chance that things will get better. Good luck with everything.