Quote:
It's not so much as what other people think about fat me, it's what I think about fat me......................hate fat me and it's not even that I can put make up on my face to 'pretty' it up, it's an ugly face.
|
Interesting because my face looked so much better when I weighed a little more. It's been 9 years ago since I was dealing with a second serious time with anorexia when my mother was dying of cancer & all the trauma I went through then with the home care person......I will never forget the first time I looked in a mirror after getting home from the medical hospital.....my hair was like straw.....& I looked like the 96 year old grandmother I had with the most ugly wrinkled looking face I could have ever imagined.......it was like having the face of a 100 year old on a 50 year old thin body.......I still have all the wrinkles....part because I had gained some weight before that last bout with anorexia but also, my teeth were so bad even as a child & I haven't been able to afford the dental bill to have them pulled & get dentures....I am sure that is part of the problem because so many of my teeth have broken off....I'm sure that last time with the anorexia didn't help that situation either because it was after that they all started to major break off...before they would just chip here & there.
Being thin in my case doesn't make me look pretty it seriously acted in the opposite way IMO