and I'm freaking out!!!!!

This has never happened to me before,at least not that I can remember,no it hasn't ever happened. I've always purged a few times a week and often a few times in those days.

I've never had this problem and now I'm ready to breakdown and cry because of it!!!

Will I get it back?
Why did this happen?
Has this happened to anyone else?

I'm sure some people would take this as a sign to stop,but all I can see right now behind the tears is that I'm going to get fat!! It almost makes me want to indulge in self destuctive behavior,just to release the anxiety!!!