Sometimes we disappoint ourselves and admonish what appears like a selfish decision. There is a reason airplane stewards tell you to affix your own oxygen mask before helping anyone next to you. Your instincts were right here. It could have ended very differently had you not heard that first bullet whirr.

What eats at our core is that over whelming fearful thought that a child could ever be taken from us. Its unbearable to imagine and i marvel at anyone who can endure such a loss. You are blessed.