I understand the feeling. I've started thinking that when i put lotion on immediately after i wash it is more of a protective layer against dirt. when i wash the next time i'm washing off the lotion and dirt it's collected on top of it, and my skin underneath is staying clean. Plus, I have to have the lotion if I want my skin to heal from washing so much and scrubbing too hard. It's difficult, but after a while I got used to it. I think as soon as your skin gets better from moisturizing, you will feel better about it being clean and not dry because the healthier it is, the less dirt can get into your skin.