Hi Omofca,
I am sorry you are going through this and I believe you will get better. If this comment is not appropriate, I hope you will forgive me or somebody here will erase it but when I read your posting the first thing I thought was "why does she/he have to apologize for being depressed?" I mean, you said something like "sorry, I know this is only in my head" or something like that.
And my reaction is "so, what" What is the difference if your problem is in your head or in your leg? Because you cannot see thoughts or feelings, are they less painful? would it be better if you can show some blood or X Rays of a broken bone? Even if there were not a chemical unbalance underlining your depression, if everything in your depression were related to your personal story, it would not matter. Depression is an illness, it is not whimming . It is a very important illness and you deserve respect. I am not sure if this is what somebody should tell you. But it is the first thing that came to my mind. I wish you the best