thanks for your support......

I have packed my partners case as if for hospital......with wash and shave things etc and pyjamas and clothes and shoes etc.....I have put in some tobacco etc as he won't be able to go buy some ( I doubt that his father will think of these things) and sent magazines and chocolate.

I have put a card inside for my partner just saying that I am thinking of him with a little verse that basically says : when life is tough we all need someone to talk to and that I am always here to listen as a friend.

I cannot help but be myself and I wish him well and hope that he gets the professional help he needs to help him to heal and get better and well again.

I just wish that his father had told me sooner as he must have known before this that his son had been admitted to hospital......I have to just hope that one day when he is healed and feels well enough he will contact me.....the he will think of his daughter and want to see her. I love him deeply.......if he wanted to talk I would go and see him........I will just pass that onto his father but I understand that he probably cannot cope with that at the moment and I just have to let him get better and think about what he wants.

His no contact and his parents telling me he was staying at friends led me to believe that he was with friends and not caring about me or baby. When in fact he was in a bad place mentally and was hospitalised......

I knew there was something not adding up and that he had no friends he could stay with and that there must have been a reason that he did not come to speak to me on that Monday. when I went up to his flat with my mum on the weds and thurs I had spoken to his mum and asked her if we should notify the police as I thought this was out of character for him to behave like this and she had text me no that he was probably staying with friends and then the next day she had text me that she had heard from him and he was staying with friends......I should have listened to my gut instinct and continued to check the flat as he was probably there in a bad way or had gone to gp and had been admitted.

My emotions have been through the ringer lately and I hope some peace and calm preside now before the birth of our daughter and that he gets the help he needs to get better and be the father my daughter deserves................x