((middie)),

I am very sorry you are dealing with all of this, especially at this very delicate time. I think you need to let go and concentrate of yourself though. From everything you have said, this bf has been troubled for a while and was just good at hiding it from you. And given his parents basically kicked him out at 18 and that is really a delicate time, it just doesn't sound like he has really ever grown up.

It really sounds like he is very confused and "he" doesn't really have any answers either.
He can't "tell you or explain" because he probably doesn't even know how.

I am wondering if his mother was dysfunctional and he never really had a healthy mothering and he is looking to fill that void with older women. If that is the case, that is something "very deep" and often not even understood by the one suffering.

Well, you are not going to know that for some time either, so it is just better you focus on your own health and that of your child.

In the meantime, you can vent as much as you need to here, we will all support you as best as we can.

Keep us posted though too.

(((Hugs)))
OE