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Old Nov 28, 2013, 10:11 AM
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RTerroni RTerroni is offline
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Member Since: Sep 2013
Location: USA
Posts: 5,751
Quote:
Originally Posted by feralkittymom View Post
I don't see anything inappropriate with measured self-disclosure by a T when guided by the needs of the client and the therapeutic situation. And I think a client has the freedom to ask any question of a T. But I think the effect on the relationship which results from that is very different from digging up info on a T in order to surreptitiously encourage disclosure. Why not simply ask the questions you want to ask, thereby giving the T the choice of what and how to self-disclose? It seems to me that would encourage a far more open and honest exchange, show greater respect for boundaries, and probably result in more comfort and security in the relationship.

It may be a perfectly understandable feeling, but the focussed and secretive intent on finding out personal info about a T is indicative of deeper needs, and therapy is the place to explore such needs, rather than indulge them without examination.
Well here is what I remember doing, I can remember when we were talking about winter sports and the like I asked her "so are you a snowboarding fan" (even though I had previously known that), then when I was talking about the city where me and the rest of my family used to accompany my dad when he had conferences there I said something along the lines of "something tells me you know a lot about that city" and then she told me that she did indeed grow up there. It's all about trying to slide it in without being too obvious.
Thanks for this!
feralkittymom