Good morning,

The therapist I did the most work with took a ration of crap I threw at her. The first session, I asked if she knew WTF she was doing. She looked me in the eye and stated, "you know I do." So, for the next year or so, I tested her in every way I could. One evening when I showed up for therapy, I started my usual BS. She took an exasperated breath and told me, "I do not need you as a patient, I have a waiting list." In my smart *** way, I told her I thought she had shown a lot of patience with me. She just looked at me, not saying a word. I got the point.

It was my "come to Jesus" session; also referred to as my "fish or cut bait" session. I pushed her as far as I could and finally hit her wall. I dropped my testing and decided to work with her instead of charging at her every session.

When I did that, I found a very strong therapeutic bond had developed despite my best efforts to avoid the closeness. I was shocked the bond was there. The therapeutic framework had been laid and I finally knew the boundaries. She passed all my tests and I felt safe enough to do the therapy.

I don't pretend to know the relationship you have with your therapist. I don't believe we can ever know. However, it wasn't until my therapist pushed back that I knew she was strong enough to go on my journey through the "valley of the shadow".

My hope for you is to find the therapist who can walk beside you on your path toward healing. Perhaps it's the one you have or someone completely different.

Regards,

Sabra