I think it became an addiction for me when I turned to it for everything. When I was a bit upset at a comment someone had made or whatever, I'd reach for the blade. When it became all I thought about - like I'd sit in a class and all I could obsess about was when I could do it next to help me feel a bit better or how to get around the things which could stop me. And when I wouldn't leave the house without a blade. That's kind of when I realised I was addicted, I guess.