I will give an example of how holding tight to boundaries produced negative effects. Once I saw a shrink who I knew cared about me, but he had a sense of professionalism that involved being neutral and objective, among other things. I experienced this as rigid, stiff, and distancing. I ended up feeling unconsciously abandoned so I would find myself acting out to get his attention. Granted I was just starting therapy and was not in good shape, but I think that if I had had an approach that was more flexible and open, I wouldn't have reacted that way. There was also more projection because he would block himself from me. My current shrink is warm and open and so there is very little projection. If people watched our sessions, they might say that there were loose boundaries, but what is actually true is that through the years we have come to deeply trust and respect each other so there more flexibility and informality. That works better for me.