Wow, talk about things getting out of hand. I seem to remember a recent letter to "Dear Abby" about this very issue.

I think it sounds like your boyfriend was getting defensive, worrying about how his relatives would respond. Frankly many of us seem to regress when it comes to dealing with holidays and relatives, not wanting to hurt their feelings, etc.

That said, I agree that it would have been nice had he agreed with you. I think his sister played a major role in this situation, as you suspect.

I think you were right to speak up. I will take your word that you have many reasons why this guy had to go. His sister would certainly be a strike against him, especially if he persistently takes her side.