I personally believe that the gf situation is added 'drama' that you really don't need right now. I'm not telling you what to do, I just feel that from your posts, this is adding a lot of added stress making it difficult for you to deal with your self.

As far as filling the emptiness, well judging by the description of this disorder, I would say that we all are desparately seeking that answer.

I attend DBT once a week for about 5 months now...I am far from healed at this point, but well into my journey...and I can honestly say it has improved many areas of my life. I feel myself actually in recovery rather than just on this miserable spiral that's out of control.