I've been married three times.

I'm 45 years old. My last divorce was two months ago, and I'm engaged again.

I can't stop thinking that maybe this is a mistake. I want to stop thinking about my x wife and move on, but another part of me thinks that I will just repeat the same mistakes with this new one as I did the last. But I keep moving forward, pushing the feelings away and forging ahead.

To me they are replaceable. I know that sounds horrible.

But if I don't stop, I may continue to do this for the rest of my life.

I don't know if I can stop this crazy train I'm on.