Quote:
Originally Posted by Syra
I'm not clear how it is necessarily so, that it creates an issue. It could also demonstrate to the client the setting of a boundary, hopefully in a clear but gentle manner, and being comfortable with that.
I guess I don't feel like I need to protect the T by not asking questions that might make him uncomfortable. I am protecting him from me. That seems to me would complicate therapy. The T has the option of answering the question, or exploring why the client wants answers to the question, and probably some other options. I don't know the questions, nor the T and client, so I don't know if I agree with his choices. It seems to me that it could be unhelpful, but I don't see the necessarily so.
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If you read my other post you'll see that I believe a client has the right and freedom to ask a T anything. This isn't about protecting the T, but rather respecting the T and the authenticity of the relationship by not surreptitiously finding info to then plan to drop into conversation as a way of manipulating disclosures.
With some Ts and clients, it would not create an issue. But the OP has discussed on a number of threads his difficulties with boundaries and disclosure and how they define the relationship for him. My point has been why the subterfuge? Why not simply ask the questions openly which then could lead to the discussion you're talking about.