Well, you asked, so I'll answer... you go.

Your hubby is a mommy's boy, and not the good kind.

He will always side with his mother, no matter how outrageously wrong she is, and having people gang up on you, people with a history of violence no less, isn't a good environment for you or your son.

Even if you are even slightly ok with this setup, think about what's best for your boy. Sooner rather than later he's gonna notice how different they treat step brothers, he's gonna wonder why he's not good enough for a brand new bike, wonder why he's not invited along for train rides yet the step brother is included and forced upon every activity he's treated to... he's gonna wonder what makes hubby's son so special, and why he doesn't measure up and what he did wrong to not deserve equality.

I'm sorry to say it, but I just don't see this setup working in your boy's favour. Yes a father is important, but at what cost? I'm a single mother, my daughter hasn't had contact with her sperm donor in 5yrs, and while its not ideal, she has healthy male role models such as my brother, her godfather and my bf.

I think you should cut your losses and run, not just because of the treatment of your son and the unfair expectations placed upon you, but also because your hubby doesn't even try.

Trying is half the battle.