I read your post and I think you and your son deserve better. You have no "ties that bind" (children from him), so you should cut your losses and leave. Find someone who will appreciate and treat you nicely. And the thing about his son accusing you of spanking him is down right SCARY! You could have SERIOUS problems with him down the road, even problems that could cause you to lose custody of your own son. You have a REALLY long life ahead of you!!! Find someone better to spend it with.