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Originally Posted by MdngtRain
I'm not advocating the si, but I want to answer your questions to the best of my ability.
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Thank you. I know you're not advocating it. I don't want to do it. But I very much appreciate your thoughtful, detailed and helpful response.
Quote:
Originally Posted by MdngtRain
I would only do this at times when I felt I would do too much damage either from having held off for too long and the urges built up too much, or from being too emotionally out of control.
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This is exactly where I'm at. I do feel emotionally out of control and I think that is what is triggering all of this and making me struggle with feeling like I need to si. Because I'm trying to fight it, the need and the urge is building up and it feels like if I allow myself to si that it will just come bursting out of me and cause too much damage. It feels really scary.
Quote:
Originally Posted by MdngtRain
I have also been known to place a phone book or large stack of magazines in front of me and cut them instead. It was also helpful when I felt more out of control. If I got the emotional energy out on the unassuming paper, I would either be ok not cutting, or I would do it much less on myself.
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I've never heard this suggestion (and I've heard MANY) but this actually sounds/feels like it could be helpful. Thank you. I may try the phone book thing...if I can find one.
Quote:
Originally Posted by MdngtRain
Lastly (or should this be first actually?), can you call you T or a crisis line to talk about what's going on?
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Crisis lines freak me out. I know I should be calling my T. I don't know if I'm just too scared, or if it's because I think I should be able to hold it all together until my next appointment (my appointments are kind of spread out and out of whack because of the holidays) but I just can't make myself call. I want to do this on my own.
Thank you so much for your response and suggestions.