Quote:
Originally Posted by Reticulous
. . .A big part of the puzzle may have to do with the fact that, for the most part, I lack an ego. I don't identify with my thoughts, and in fact, I generally don't think in language, more in concepts and ideas. So I understand that, as far as a personality goes...nobody is home. . .
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In his book
Disorders of the Self (sorry, no online version I know of)Marshall Silverstein characterizes Avoidant Personality Disorder as a condition of a "devitalized", unmirrored self.
In his framework I think it's fair to say I had a fragmented self (obsessive-compulsive personality disorder). My current therapist diagnosed me with PDNOS and DDNOS about 4 years ago. I'm getting far less fragmented, close to being "whole", maybe, but it hasn't been easy.
PD's are very hard to treat, as you also probably know -- especially when the therapist you happen to go to doesn't know anything about them, doesn't know how to diagnose them, doesn't believe in them, thinks their ordinary day-to-day counseling skills will be sufficient to "help" the person, etc., etc.
Are you able to get yourself moving in order to try to find a good therapist for yourself (and your marriage and your child)? If not, is there anything that you can think of that I could do to try to help motivate you?