I completely understand this line of thinking but this is all eating disorder brain talking!!! Think of what you are saying "I need to look sicker to get help" have you get heard of a schizophrenic say they need more hallucinations before try are worthy of seeking help? It sounds absurd- does one have to suffe x amount before being worthy?

It has been my experience that you will never feel like you look whatever part you have in your head that feels worthy....help from a therapist doesn't come pouring in because you look one way or another....it's such an illusion and a lie we tell ourselves. What you need emotionally has nothing, absolutely NOTHING to do with how your body looks.