So my best friend just told me she has no hope for me. Seriously. She is a social worker and has seen all kinds of horrors of Bipolar. She has felt uneasy sharing with me her immense fear regarding my Bipolar and I know it was a hard thing for her to do. I understand having fear about Bipolar. What I did not realize until just now on the phone is that she said she is just not able to have hope for me, faith in me, or to believe in me right now. I asked her if she could at least believe in me and be scared at the same time. I mean that is what I am doing. But she said she hoped she could someday.

Her feelings might make you think that I am reckless with meds and not taking things seriously etc. I am completely committed to my meds. I do every lifestyle thing you can do from not drinking to getting sleep to exercising and my light box. I read, I research. I have children so I am extremely motivated to be as healthy as possible. I am a fighter through and through.

It sucks that she doesn't believe in me. It hurts very much. And it scares me to know that this person who is so important to me has no hope for my future. When we got off the phone I sobbed like a child for reasons not entirely clear to me. It is late so I couldn't call anyone else. So I came here to find some friends. People who get it. The best kind of people. Bipolar people

Has this kind of thing happened to anyone else?