I think you did the right thing by reaching out. I just found that I really identified with what you were going through when you were considering making the phone call, all of the what ifs and I shoulds. From your posts, it seemed like there were so many things you were saying to yourself that fed into that anxiety. I don't mean that as a criticism at all, I just recognise how hard it is to reach out when those things that you're telling yourself are what you believe.

I find that now, looking back, those things I said to myself, back when I was in that moment of anxiety, were really important.

I hope you have an answer soon if you don't yet. A month long break can feel like such a long time, I find.