Whoa, hubs getting more and more angry and hostile. I have been coming out of my shell and standing up for myself lately and he has threatened to put me out and now physically threatening me. He doesn't seem to want me to assert myself in any way that effects him. That is unless I am taking care of his needs. things like bringing him food, washing his clothes, cleaning. taking out the trash. writing checks to pay bills etc..

How should I react or respond or change my behavior. I let him walk away and when he returned to take his meds I told him I wasn't afraid of him. His response was "I don't care".

We have been married for 38 years, most of which I just went along with everything. He is an alcoholic with an addictive personality (don't they all?). He has been on pain meds, for a back injury, for over 10 years. A few years ago his 2 grown daughters, that he gave up his custody to when they were about 2-3 years old, got back in touch with him.

There has been a a lot of contact and visits to see them, despite them being in another state. One with 2 boys did severe contact with him after he visited and was drinking again. She did call him when he was diagnosed with laryngeal cancer. He is 3 months out from radiation treatment and so far no more cancer. I have been his sole caretaker and saved his life when he went into respiratory failure after a radiation treatment.

I'm trying to go with the flow.

His other daughter has been wanting to move in and include her daughter(and boyfriend)and our great grand daughter. The grand daughter has spent summers with us, lived with us(as a teenager) and the daughter also lived with us. This ended when hubs got fired for costing his employer alot of $, due to neglect. This was very out of character for him! Before that he was fired from his long time employment for failure to adjust his attitude.

I don't know if I can keep going with this flow. Please give me some opinions, ideas or sugestions about any or all of this.