Dear Switch,

Are you working with a therapist? We mostly don't remember traumatic incidents in our life....in childhood, we may not be aware that we're being violated and memory isn't fully developed. When we are older, we tend to block it out.

Pls don't doubt that people will not believe you. Working with a therapist may be the right place to start, rather than entering hospital....it would be good if there is someone in your life (family...or friends) who can take care you so that you don't think of committing suicide again.

If you are suicidal, you should be on anti-depressents. Pls meet a doc to decide on it.

Also....right now, only your mental health is the priority....you don't have to worry about your bf's pain. Pls have a heart to heart talk with your bf....tell him that you are struggling....that's why, you can't be his gf right now....just a good friend. Entering into a relationship, requires that both people are emotionally healthy. Right now, you are going thru a lot of pain. Healing that is the only priority now.

Pls meet with a therapist if you are not seeing one. If you are already seeing one, and are not comfortable with em.....pls don't be afraid to look for new therapists you are comfortable with.

We're here to help. Good luck!!