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Old Dec 03, 2013, 09:42 PM
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Open Eyes Open Eyes is offline
Legendary Wise Elder
 
Member Since: Mar 2011
Location: Northeast USA
Posts: 23,288
Quote:
Originally Posted by middie View Post
Thanks OE......
Your reply is very much appreciated.

I don't know how bad his breakdown is.....I really don't have much information at all....other than what his father has told me and that is very little as he at the time had only seen him once and that was for a short period. His father said that he was in a terrible condition and only mentioned me and baby and his son broke down and didn't stop crying for the rest of his visit. It really sounds like a bad breakdown.

When I went through my divorce, my mother and father had cancer at the same time and I was just coming to the end of a second degree course and my ex also would not let me take my children. I am unsure if I went through a nervous breakdown however, my sister took me to see my GP and he gave me medication for depression and anxiety/stress.

He asked me if I wanted him to refer me into the hospital and I declined, instead I stayed with family and took the mediation for a few weeks and then decided that it was only numbing my ability to feel my emotions and decided instead to go for counselling and did lots of exercise. I realise that we all feel differently and respond in different ways.

I also accept that I am not the most patient person in the world....this is something I struggle with as I like to sort things out as soon as possible.

once again I thank you for your reply.....it was most helpful....hugs x
Yes, it does sound like a bad breakdown if his father only got to see him for a few minutes, mentioned you and it only got him to break into tears. It sounds like he is very, very lost and has no direction or mindset to even be capable of having a sense of direction. I have been in that mindset myself tbh, so I know what you cannot expect even though you want to. For him to be hospitalized that long, he must not be doing well and even capable of leaving and going into an outpatient program.

I can't blame you for wanting answers though, after all, it was sudden and you are expecting a child too.

When it comes to mental illness, we have to learn patience. I would rather not support any negativity or judgment calls about him either because it really could be that he is genuinely struggling. As a person who genuinely struggled and faced unfair judgment or criticism from others myself, I feel it is important to give this time and try not to jump to bad conclusions.

It is too bad that he is not your husband where you can approach the people who are on his treatment team yourself where you could get more information.

You need to take care of your needs right now, and as I said, if you need to talk, we are here to listen.

((Hugs))
OE

Last edited by Open Eyes; Dec 03, 2013 at 09:55 PM.
Hugs from:
middie
Thanks for this!
middie