Well, the day has totally gone to pot. Evidently the facility didn't like how I felt with the patient who was being a PITA and they called my boss. He came by and I now have to go to the office tomorrow for a formal *****ingout. I'm fully expecting to get fired.

I can't do this anymore. I can't keep being a failure. I have been fired from EVERY SINGLE JOB I've had since I left the Marines. I'm pretty sure the Marines would have fired me if they could have......

I can't support my children anymore if I get fired.......

What I wouldn't give to figure out how to commit suicide without it affecting them. I'd do it in a heartbeat if I could figure out a way.....

I can't even give them back to their mother and just disappear.....She already abandoned them. I couldn't do it to them too.....

But having such a failure as a father..... Holy hell....