I tend to sometimes go off the deep end (at least in my mind) but I always know how to reel it back in, I just need the time and space to do so. I've learned over the years how to manage myself appropriately (she has actually said how impressed she is at my self taught techniques throughout life). But still, for people who don't know me well - the things I say and think can sometimes scare them.

I do this too. T said that she needs to know these things so that she can be on my side if anything happens. She's seen me in "scary spots" and I've always somehow claw my way back. I've scared her, concerned her and I have yet to be committed. We had a long talk about why I haven't been committed. The conclusion is I've been dealing with these things so long by myself that she has to trust that I'll reach out when I can/ if I need to and at the very least I'm getting those thoughts out.