I have so been there, and yes, it is really hard. For me what it took was trying a few times. I tried the patch, and I tried gum, and then I tried wellbutrin. What finally worked for me was a combo of 4 things at once: I bought an e-cigarette with no-nicotine cartridges and I'll explain why in a sec, I used wellbutrin, I also used Chantix at the same time, and then I made sure to read at least one anti smoking add or info of some kind a day. I ended up obsessing with how bad smoking was, and then I started to identify with the fact my grandma died of lung cancer before I was born. When I was freaking out I'd puff on the e-cigarette and it would help me some. The Chantix and wellbutrin combo did seem to help take a lot of the mental anguish away. I literally came to hate cigarettes and be repulsed by them by reading all this bad stuff and getting super mad at the cigarette companies. Also, I chose to go no-nicotine about a week or two into Chantix mostly because nicotine leaves your system completely in three days, so the physical withdrawals which are awful only last 3 days. The mental addiction is insanely powerful, I mean it is crazy how hooked I was psychologically on those cigs. (Cravings still crop up today, but not very often.) I think the thing that helped the most with the mental part was that I went so far as to read emphysema and lung cancer support chat rooms. I'd ask a therapist before doing this though, because it had some negative consequences as well.