Again, irrational, that MOMENT, remember you said it was a 1 time thing? It wasn't special and intimate, she felt pressured and then he bloody upped and left even though she went through with it anyway. There's nothing special about that!

My advice? Stop being so bloody self-absorbed. You're a virgin, so what? No really, so what!... does it decrease the value of your life? Does it hinder your ability to function? Does it make you less of a humanbeing?

No.

You know what I can't fathom? The fact that there are people who have vast sexual experience, people that when they fall inlove with an inexperienced partner, wait for them and don't pressure them to catch up or make it an issue. Even though you'd probably expect them to because they're used to having sex as a regular componant of their relationships...

Yet here you are, never had sex and making an issue out of it as if you are being robbed of it.

You can't miss what you've never had...

So yeah, I think that as much as you profess to care about this girl, you're way too self-absorbed and you are minimizing her legitmate problem by focussing on the one you're creating for yourself.

If I were you, I would go see a therapist and work on my insecurity, and I'd help her get to therapy and when we eventually do have sex, beautiful, intimate, loving sex, it will actually be a first for us both.

Honestly though from this post, I don't think you're mature enough to have sex, not with her anyway. She needs someone who can put her first and be sensitive toward her needs, and I don't see you being able to do that with all that you've posted regarding bringing your unfounded insecurities to the table...

ETA: If your gf has any inkling of your jealousy over the TRAUMATIZING way she lost her virginity, the chances of sex with her has decreased considerably...
Just giving you a heads up.