Quote:
Originally Posted by A Red Panda
I totally hear you on the panic over having to move back - I've had to do that too. It was horrific. I was basically in meltdown city for almost a year before going back! (was in England on a 2-year visa. It was ending and I had to go back).
I didn't think that becoming financially independent was your only goal for indepedence though?
What are you (and your T) working on to help you handle those thoughts and emotions? Like... what stuff has she been teaching/encouraging you to do when she's not around? I'm assuming that you did at least give them a go yesterday - because you did manage to spend the day solo! I'm just curious as to what you did that helped you through that. Honestly, I'd like to be able to give you props for doing whatever it was you were doing and help encourage you to do it more often. Because the solo skills are the ones that will help you the longest throughout your life.
|
No. You're right. I need to be emotionally independent as well.
Well, mindfulness but I kinda suck at that unless I'm just trying to focus on drawing or something, writing my emotions instead of acting on them, frozen oranges, sitting with feelings, I played a grounding technique game with one of my friends last night via text without her knowing I needed it, distracting myself. Stuff like that.
I told my T about everything today. I eventually told her how confused I felt when she said she loves me and then got mad at me. I asked her if it was a mistake. She said it wasn't a mistake that she said that, she won't confirm that she meant it at this point, she said that I already know what she meant by it and that I'm ruminating too much. She apologized for being a bit too harsh in the afternoon. She said she was too "triggery". I told her I was afraid to see her the next day and looping around thinking about it. We didn't have time to address all of it today. She wants to talk about it on Monday with me.
So I feel better. I could feel everything was normal between us again. I still need to figure out how to be more independent.