i have been fallen in love since 2007 . i went to another state to complete my graduation. during that time (2010) , my boy friend met another girl and he was dated with her. after that he cheated me lot.. even after i accepted him with his kinda character. she not that much prettier that me.. may be she is thin but she had scars in her face,dull face.(no one prefer that girl)

i have a good prettier face,bubbly and medium length hair.My boy friend also looks good. Nowadays i am not believing him(only after he cheated me lot).
i think i am that much attracted him.. he needs more caring. even i am caring towards him everytime.what makes him to looks her more important than me?
somedays i went behind his back, and figured out all of this.
i feel like at time i am un-attracted to him. I've kind of let myself go over the past few months. everytime he makes me fool and going somewhere without my knowledge. may be he hiding because of me.. everyday i will ask him to prove that "where you are? with whom you are now? give your phone to your friend"" (such such things).. i know it will make him irritate deeply.. even though he will try to answer my question calmly at that time when i get upset..sometimes he will say that " Please give me some space, i too have some feeling, dont treat me as slave""

I constantly picture him with past girlfriends/friends and I feel like I'm about going to go in a jealous rage I don't understand. I go through his friend list on fb and I have made him block other women on fb before that I felt like they were a threat to me. He's never cheated on me, but I think I'm just really insecure and afraid of him leaving me for someone else because I never feel good enough. I know he is getting sick and tired of this behavior, but I can't bring myself to change.

He's been in abusive relationships with women before so I feel bad because I can be quite controlling at times, and sometimes I freak out and put my hands on him. I haven't done it in awhile.

Sometimes I feel like he would rather be with some else who was prettier and more happier. I don't want to push him away, I want to be able to trust him. I don't want to hurt him anymore. I need advice desperately
sometimes i i hate myself for torturing my loved one.. he is the one who made me feel more happy and he is the one who made me worry deeply.. i dont want to leave him.. i need him... i wannna trust him.. what i should do? because of this thought he is not showing his love on me. If i ask why you are showing care on me? he will say" baby you not allowing me to do it so".. "if you believes me really you will feel my love" he says.. what i should do? plz friends help me to get out of this thought.. can i marry him?

He saying that " just come and stay with me . we will live together then only you believes me"