This has been bugging me since I saw my T last week.....

I told him that I was experiencing him differently over the last few weeks(been in therapy for about 10 months)...that I found him more relaxed and warm? He laughed and joked that he had had a holiday. Then became serious and told me that now he feels he can "be more real" with me, that he feels better able to be more honest with me especially around highlighting any 'patterns' he sees. He also said that he thinks that being "real" in therapy is vital to its success.

That all sounds understandable and I think I agree that a certain genuineness in the therapy relationship is important to its success right? My confusion and worry is this.....what was I doing that stopped him being genuine before now? What stopped him being that way from the beginning, or is it just me that ahs not allowed it?

And then I jump to....please don't become too warm and kind and genuine in the sessions because it feels too uncomfortable when you come close emotionally and/or I really can't handle then messing up again and there being a distance between us? What is wrong with me and my thinking here? (Just to give context, am in therapy for complex-PTSD)

Do you find your T's to be "real"?