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Old Dec 09, 2013, 01:39 AM
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steelfang steelfang is offline
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Member Since: May 2013
Location: California
Posts: 302
As others have mentioned, hallucinations are not found in hypomania but are characteristic of mania.

How much are you sleeping? Is it just 1-3 hours less than usual? Or are you sleeping only 2-4 hours a night (or sometimes not at all)? How about appetite? For me it goes away down during mania. Are the racing thoughts entertaining and pleasant for you? Or do you feel "possessed", controlled by your mind, and disturbed by the intensity and speed of your brain? Are you not bothered by the perceived slow pace of others relative to you? Or is nothing fast enough for you? Do you find yourself talking to yourself or being paranoid? Thinking everyone is talking to you or about you!

I compare mania to what I imagine a meth high would feel like. I function on very little sleep and feel very Amped no matter what. I will not shut the hell up and laugh at everything. I befriend many people then regret it when is crash since I usually I keep to myself. I lose my appetite and for usually repulsed me. I sometimes dress very lavishly or provocatively when I am usually conservative. I feel superhuman, like no one can stop me and I can do anything. I feel very philosophical, like we are all one and I am in awe at the beauty of the universe. I spent 1000 in 2 weeks when I am usually a frugal person. I speed at 65 mph in a 25 zone when I am usually cautious. However I start hearing things and become very paranoid and this is when mania becomes very ugly for me. I get sleep paralysis, come up with wacky and insane ideas, and think everyone is plotting against me or making fun of me. Then the high becomes a bad trip and all I want to do is go to sleep.

During my manias, I am still functional in a societal sense but neglect all of my coursework due to a low concentration (and insane hyperactivity) and overconfidence. This causes me to perform very poorly in my courses when I am usually a model student. I have had to drop all but one class this semester due to several manic episodes, therefore rendering me unable to function in my scholastic environment,

Since I was also functional in society, I initially thought I was bipolar 2. However my pdoc said that when your manic behaviors totally contradict the traits of your core personality hypomania can be ruled out. Hypomanic individuals do not lose touch with their personality. Psychosis, paranoia (if you don't have Anxiety disorders), or hallucinations of any kind automatically point to mania. Since those all applied to me, I received a bipolar 1 diagnosis even though I was socially functional.
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