support and enabling... I'll use the same analogy that my mom used with me.

When a sappling is growing, you have to give it a "straight" support in order for it to grow straight and strong.

Enabling, on the other hand, is to leave the sappling alone and when it starts bending, you offer it a "support" that allows it to grow bent. You ENABLE it to grow twisted and bent in it's own, perhaps twisted, way.

On the side of the freeway in a town in which I lived... and next to a frontage/service road, there was a palm. The road was named after it; Crooked Palm Rd. You could see where the palm had taken, for some reason, a spurt of grown in exactly a 45 degree angle. Someone had come along and built a SUPPORT for it.

In order not to break it, they had followed the bend in it by nailing some boards to the straight trunk, another one with the bend in it, and had tied some new growth to another brace going straight up. The palm tree had again started growing straight.

Had not these SUPPORTS been placed there, the palm no doubt would have broken at the bend and died or grown even more deformed.