I'm wondering if anybody else gets angry when they get ill?
I find that being ill is an incredibly depressing time for me. When I feel it coming on I start to get more and more anxious because I don't know how severely it's going to affect my day to day routines.
Yesterday I felt pretty rough, I had a sore throat and felt a bit sore across my shoulders. When I went to bed last night, I realised I was running a fever and had trouble getting to sleep because I couldn't stop coughing.
During the night, I woke up soaked in sweat several times and ended up sleeping for around 14 hours in total. I got up today and I am still running a high fever, throat is so swollen I can barely swallow, and every muscle in my body is aching. I'm pretty sure I've got the flu, which makes it the second time in my life that I've caught the full blown flu virus.
On top of feeling so rough though, I also feel incredibly angry about the fact I'm unwell. It's already ruined my day because I slept too late, thus 'broke' my routines for the start of the day. I'm also stressed because I have a few appointments this week that I've been waiting for a while to get and I really can't stand the thought that random illness is putting me at risk of not getting to them.
I do have OCD as well as AS, and part of my OCD is fear of illness. So I'm not sure how much of these feelings come from my AS and how much are from my OCD.
Maybe anger when ill is completely normal for everybody, I don't know, just curious what you guys think of getting ill. Do you resent it all the more for it's effect on your daily routines?
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